Downright Donkeys Team Thread - 2009

[ZoraxDoom]

Downright Donkeys Team Discussion and Free Milkshake Thread 2009

In the immortal words of Tassie:

To all of the people that have signed up to this great club, welcome, and may your career be long and prosperous. To all of the people that haven't, please leave the thread before I unchain the dogs.

This is the season where our wildest dreams will come true. Out profits will be beyond this world, our balance sheets will explode with revenue, our income will equal the GPD of several small African countries put together. This folks, is the season where we go where no team has gone before.

Under my leadership, we shall not only be playing stylish, dominating and outstanding cricket, but we shall also lose whatever we put our hand to. We shall contrive means and ways to lose matches from positions where no team has lost before, to throw away victory that seems gifted to us, to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. We will drive our bookies insane. We will be swimming in our winnings. We shall do our name proud and end up bottom in the table but on top of the Awesome charts.

This...is the Season of the Donkey.


Squad:

Player: Zoraxdoom (Skipper)
Bat: RHB
Bowl: LBG
Playing Role: Bowling - allrounder

Player: Leicester Fox
Bat: RHB
Playing Role: Pure batsman

Name: KBChandraw
Preference: Pure Bat
Batting: RHB

Player: tassietiger
Bat: RHB
Bowl: Pies
Playing Role: Wicket Keeper

Player: Pal
Bat: RHB
Bowl: RF
Playing Role: Pure bowler

Name: Therbs
Preference: Pure Bowler
Batting: RHB
Bowling: RF

Player: Whitehornmatt
Preference: Pure Bowl
Batting: RHB
Bowling: RF

Player: Panda
Preference: Pure Bowl
Batting: RH
Bowling: RFM

Name: iloveireland
Preference: Pure Bat
Batting: RHB

Player: Spinksy
Preference: Pure Bowl
Batting: RH
Bowling: Leg Spin

Player: Burnsy1
Preference: Pure Bowl
Batting: RH
Bowling: Offies

Player: Safrican
Preference: Batsman
Batting: RH

Player: Hamish
Preference: Opening Bat
Batting: RH

Player: Jakester1288
Preference: Batting AR
Batting: RH
Bowling Offies

Player: MightyPies
Preference: Batsman
Batting: RH

Player: Brute Edge
Preference: Batting AR
Batting: LH
Bowling: SLA

Our sponsors have signed us on for another season, being the loyal and reliable names that they are. That, and I was too lazy to find new ones. Plus, who can be bothered designing a new kit?

Kool Mints - Despite spelling 'cool' with a K -which is criminally uncool- they continue to be loyal and long-serving sponsors. Mainly because no one else will buy their junk. Pal attributes his sucesses last season to the use of Kool mints on and off the field, while BarmyArmy claims it's his pure skill but we all know that his breath really isn't that minty fresh.
Advanced Hair Studios - We've got better hair than the Soakers, Indian Warriors and the Pakistani Legends combined. Yea, I said it.
God - Where would we be without the big man? If rain were programmed into Cricsim, all our games would be mini-typhoons. But since they aren't, he just helps us scam Satan.

And ofcourse, there is our ground.

Shrek's Swamp​

Poor pitch doesn't even begin to describe it.

And the Kits:

​

And finally, a word from the skipper:

All hail Zorax. Bow down to your new leader. Under me, a new, dreadfully unsuccessful era shall begin. I promise nothing more than losses, and nothing less than my absolute worst! It doesn't matter if you win or lose, but how much you earn doing so!
'MON DA DONKEYS!!!!​

 

[KBC]

We'll be the champs again, zorax style!

 

[Dr. Pepper]

I hate you.

 

[ZoraxDoom]

Juxtaposition. OMG!!!


I own you. (Check the sig)

 

[MattW]

Downright Donkeys Team Discussion and Free Milkshake Thread 2009

Pro Tip - Don't buy Iced Chocolate from a place that also sells Milkshakes, all you get is a half finished one a customer rejected.

 

[ZoraxDoom]

Juxtaposition. OMG!!

What's an Iced Chocolate?

 

[MattW]

It is like Iced Coffee, but with Chocolate. Basically chocolate milk with a bit of iced cream on top, so essentially an unmixed chocolate milkshake.

The big question really is, what amount of ice cream signifies the shift from a milkshake to a thickshake? I'd imagine there'd be statutory standards, but in practice I'd wonder if there are breaches being made.

On another drink related topic, Dr. Pepper reading the thread reminded me of an observation I made about the drink. For some reason they stopped making it for the Aussie market. A while back I tasted some American Dr Pepper, and went 'that explains it', but then I drank some British Dr Pepper, which reminded me of why I wanted to drink it again in the first place.

Therefore Britain > America.

 

[ZoraxDoom]

Juxtaposition. OMG!!!

A thickshake is one which loses any sense of viscosity. It becomes impossible to suck through a standard straw. If you need to use one of those fat straws, you know it's a thickshake.

 

[MattW]

Juxtaposition. OMG!!!

A thickshake is one which loses any sense of viscosity. It becomes impossible to suck through a standard straw. If you need to use one of those fat straws, you know it's a thickshake.

It's odd that at most places you get the same straw either way. I like it when you get those spoon straws, like with slurpees, those are hours of fun.

 

[Dr. Pepper]

It is like Iced Coffee, but with Chocolate. Basically chocolate milk with a bit of iced cream on top, so essentially an unmixed chocolate milkshake.

The big question really is, what amount of ice cream signifies the shift from a milkshake to a thickshake? I'd imagine there'd be statutory standards, but in practice I'd wonder if there are breaches being made.

On another drink related topic, Dr. Pepper reading the thread reminded me of an observation I made about the drink. For some reason they stopped making it for the Aussie market. A while back I tasted some American Dr Pepper, and went 'that explains it', but then I drank some British Dr Pepper, which reminded me of why I wanted to drink it again in the first place.

Therefore Britain > America.

Indeed...

Zorax smells. *Runs off*

 

[ZoraxDoom]

Juxtaposition. OMG!!!

I have a nose. Ofcourse I smell. Atleast I don't stink, like your team.

 

[SciD]

Juxtaposition. OMG!!!

Only KBC.

 

[KBC]

*Shoo* *Shoo*

 

[ZoraxDoom]

Juxtaposition. OMG!!!

Right. My laptop hard disk crashed, and I can only go to get it fixed after 5th June. How long it will take to fix, I have no idea, but till that day, I have virtually no computer access. Not even for a little bit.

So should any Donkey related work arise such as de-listing players or posting lineups or such, you all will need to take care of it. Or not. Whatever.

 

[MattW]

You're just doing that to get out of starting your posts with Juxtaposition. OMG!!!