School Jokes

[duffarama]

Enjoy:

Picking on a tardy student
A college business professor could not help but notice that one of his students was late to class for the third time that week. Before class ended he went around the room asking students some questions about the day's lecture. Of course, he made sure to pick on his tardy pupil.

"And who was it that developed the theories behind communism?" the professor asked.

"I don't know," the student said.

"Perhaps if you came to class on time, Mr. Reebs, you would know," said the professor.

"That's not true," the student replied. "I never pay attention anyway!"

Does anyone else have any funny school jokes?
From Duffarama

 

[brad352]

Does anyone else have any funny school jokes?

Well funnier than that anyway

 

[duffarama]

Then why don't you post them Brad?

 

[the twin]

i'm not strickly sure if this is a "school" joke, but its close enough.



A professor stood before his Philosophy 101 class and had some items
in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very
large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf
balls.
He then asked the students if the jar was full?
They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into
the jar.
He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles, of course, rolled into
the open areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students

again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He then asked once more if the jar was full.
The students responded with a unanimous - - yes.

The professor then produced two cans of beer from under the table and


the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to
recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things - - your family, your partner, your health, your children, your friends, your favorite passions - - things that if
everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still
be full."

"The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your
house, your car. The sand is everything else - - the small stuff."

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no

room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for your life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will

never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay

attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with

your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner

out dancing. Play another 18. There will always be time for me to go

to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal."



"Take care of the golf balls first -- the things that really matter.

Set your priorities. The rest is just sand." One of the students

raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented. The professor

smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter

how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of

beers!

 

[duffarama]

Ha ha mate, that was very funny. But it would've been even funnier if you formatted your text properly.

 

[viveksanthosh]

good school jokes

 

[duffarama]

Is that all you can say mate? viveksanthosh

 

[gold639]

Yeah man and there were just 2 jokes posted.(out of which the second one wasn't even a school joke)

 

[duffarama]

Well it was close enough mate.

 

[vibs89]

Hahaha that'S FUNNY MAN I BURST WITH LAUGHING

 

[duffarama]

Should I post another lame school joke?

 

[gold639]

NO!!

Ofcourse,post one,but how can it be a joke when it is not funny?

 

[duffarama]

Well here is another joke. My old school was a 'joke.'

 

[brad352]

You're a bloody joke, stfu and gtfo

 

[duffarama]

Thanks Brad, much appreciated. I take your previous post as a joke!