The rhyme all the time thread

[barmyarmy]

Here's a new thread in which we all can share
To stop all these posts that are driving me spare
In here you can rap, you can speak in rhyme
Remember that and you'll be just fine
If I find a post with rhyming malaise
I'll get up my tools and I'll hit the erase
Poetry, rap, even freestyle is sound
But make sure you do cos I'll be around
If I find you've been rassing and for sure I'll know
I'll bury your ass under 10 feet of snow

 

[Cricketman]

mod edit - doesn't rhyme with anything

 

[JamesyJames3]

Colin sucks eggs and Briggsey just sucks,
One thing we know is Stevie's eating duck,
Kev's an old man, and muel is a joker,
Then there's me, I'm a really hard worker!
I'm a sports journo and don't forget that,
Otherwise I may just write a lie that your a paedo and fat.
That's my entrance to this new thread,
Only one hour to go, till I hit my bed.

 

[Simbazz]

That is wicked,
That is cool,
This is my last in this god damn thread,
cos i cant rap.

ouch. All that needs to be said.

 

[Kev]

I wondered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er vales and hills
When all at once I saw a thread
Where the rhymes posted made me wish i was dead.


(Just about now Wordsworth is spinning quietly in his grave)

 

[barmyarmy]

I must down to this thread again, to the lonely souls who do lie
And all I ask is a short trip, long enough to make Jamesy cry
And his body kick as I sing a song and pick him up and shake him
And a red mist above my head as I bring him to the point of breaking

(Masefield's rolling too)

 

[Kev]

Alas poor Jamesy, I knew him Horatio
A fellow of infinite frowns
Of most excellent spam
He hath borne me to tears a thousand times
And now, how abhorred on this board he is.


Ok, So I've murdered the ultimate. So here's a short one dedicated to you Colin

The best-laid schemes o' admins an 'globies
Gang aft agley,

 

[evertonfan]

I have no idea who Wordsworth is,
because I am a little div,
I play Pro Evo every day,
because McLaren's flipping gay,
i'd like to manage that team myself,
and tell Wright-Phillips he's an elf,
whilst here I wish upon a star,
that one can help me from afar,
I need to finish this coursework,
but my mind's struggling to work,
instead of concentrating hard,
i'm trying to rhyme and smell like lard,
my banging choons are not helping,
and nor is my dog who is annoyingly yelping,
maybe I should go and feed it?
But sod it I cry, she can wait a bit.
Why oh why am I still here?
I'm really feeling rather queer,
Alas good sir my time is up!
so I clench my hands around my cup,
a cup of tea to end the day,
while stevie throws his pasty away

 

[usy]

Mod edit - not enough attempt at rhyming

 

[evertonfan]

That does not rhyme you silly fool,
now get to bed and wait for school

 

[Kev]

Spam to right of them
Spam to left of them
Spam in front of them
Volley'd and Leg-Glanced
Storm'd at with bouncer and ball
Boldly they posted and well
Into the Jaws of Death
Into the Never Ending Topics and Games Forum
Rode the six hundred.

 

[usy]

Here we go.

PlanetCricket reaching 2008
No time to wait
Mama tol’ me to eat lunch
But how could i, i was late.
When was kev last went on date
I remember 1968
Get the bread, and some butter
Son you’ll like this, coz your papa is a rappa
Santa clause in December
Faisal Iqbal got owned as far as I remember



oooo..OO.. usTT..

 

[evertonfan]

Usy that is awful rap,
in fact i'd say it's utter crap

 

[usy]

Hurt, slap, kick, face, ace, pace
Wet, weather, see how i put it together

 

[evertonfan]

Usy you have failed this time,
to make your post in this thread rhyme,
I suggest you go to bed,
and rest your slightly empty head