To Russia via...

[Jaztheman]

Sunderland. It looks like the poor side of Newcastle, a poor mans Newcastle if you like. As upon entering Sunderland there were loads of roadworks with these machine things that look like things I shouldn't really mention in a diary that anyone of any age can read. Lennon, I found out the hippies name after some hard intense interrogation work, said that they were called drills. I had something beginning in d in mind but it definitely wasn't called a drill...

On the of the roadworks we went by had a radio and it had the news on. With the traffic getting longer by the second we put down the window and decided to see if we could get any of the new gossip. I wasn't ready for what happened next though.

"Fire breaks out on the outskirts of Moscow, Russia as several thousand are thought to have been killed. Many more thousand expected to be severely injured. It's the biggest tragedy to happen in Russia, in years! The fire was thought to of been started..."

Outskirts of Moscow? That's where my family live! Well lived, I don't know where they live now but I sure hope they moved recently, or in the last 15 years. What if they died? Oh no. I have to get to Russia quicker now. With the traffic getting longer and longer still, which seemed impossible at the time, I spotted a little country road. A country road in Sunderland? Fair enough.

"Lennon, I think we should take that country road, bro."
"Radical thinking. Let's hit it!"

A full 90 degree turn came as we went straight over a speed bump at 60mph and started bombing down the country lane. I then got creeped out as the thing you would least expect from a hippy then happened. His hands clenched harder and harder on the steering wheel and a sudden grin appeared on his face...

"It's time..."

His left hand then came of the steering well. He opened the glove compartment and took out a CD. I couldn't see what CD though as his long dark hair got in the way. He then ejected the CD and inserted the new CD. Remember the saying; expect the unexpected?

"Hit it!"

I'm On A Highway To Hell then came blaring on and he turned up the volume. It was almost defaming! Does it matter though? It's just my kind of music. We then looked at each other, looked straight ahead at the road which overlooked the sea. Then in sync, as if it was planned, we started head banging to the sweat tune by AC/DC.

 

[Kiko_97]

Whoa, what a story this is James, what a storyline great work here James KUTGW.

 

[Ayub 95]

Wow i love this story esp the first part but its great

 

[PhilD123]

I know, a babe in Manchester?

Why the surprise James? Of course she's attractive coming from round these parts.

Brilliant story though, nice to see one with a storyline etc.

 

[shantanu_rooney]

I know, a babe in Manchester?

Lol thats great . Brilliant Storyline James . Just read it and its exciting to read the story again and again .

 

[treva]

So you want to be in a coma again then James? Well your going the right way about it with this guy

 

[m_vaughan]

Wow, I love this story simply because of the amount of alcohol in it

Great start. I might have got the jist right but I really dont have a clue of where this might be going so am gonna be following it.

 

[shefellover93]

Can't wait for the next update mate!!!

 

[Jaztheman]

You gotta squeeze a little, squeeze a little
Tease a little more
Easy operator come a knockin' on my door
Sometime, anytime, sugar me sweet
Little miss innocent sugar me, yeah!

Def Leppard were one of the many other bands he seemed to have on the CD whom you would more expect a heavy metalist or a some rock dude to listen to. Evidently not. The country road that I said to go down seemed to of been a right choice as we were heading straight for a harbor. This could be my shortcut to Russia!

"Lennie, I need a boat."
"Pour some sugar on me, ooh in the name of love!"
"Lennie!"
"Sorry about that, the tune goes straight to your br..."
"I need a boat."
"I've got it covered."

Eh? If this car turns into Chitty Chitty Bang Bang then it's as if my life is being written. We arrived at the harbor, 1 beer in hand, or two in my case. We looked around to see if there was anyone there; it was deserted. We continued to walk further into the harbor where there were no ships and no people. Abandoned maybe? Abandoned for everything but one thing. A rubber dingy with plastic paddles.

"I see my destiny, Lennie. I can see my way to my future."
"John? Is that you?"

So maybe it wasn't flour in the van, lucky I took none. I couldn't leave Lennie in this terrible country with horrible women, well Manchester was full of them anyway. We went back to the van and got all we could. A radio and 17 bottles of Stella Artois, our morals are in the right place. I threw him onto the boat before I jumped in after him. We both took a paddle and set away into the sea, not knowing where we would end up. It took me about an hour to notice that there was a box at the back of the boat. A box on an abandoned boat?

I opened the box and to my surprise saw what looked to be a sheep liver. I'm not a cannibal but if I get hungry on this trip then I know what I'm going to eat. I've never tried sheep liver before...

So the scene is set and there we are, going out into the sea not knowing where we're going or where we're going to end up. All I know is that we're gonna get drunk tonight. Little did I know or notice when coming to the boat that Lennie had brought his CD. So it looked like there wouldn't be a dull moment nor a silent one. The first song that came on? Get stoned by Hinder. How Ironic?

 

[vickyrox]

great update

 

[treva]

Awesome stuff. Very funny and neatly wrote. This could go very far my friend, and I hope it does

 

[Simbazz]

Comical write!

Its a nice start, even though it has no football tagged onto it But great start nonetheless!!!!

 

[Mad Snake]

magnificent, awesome writing love reading it

 

[Jaztheman]

The open sea looks so beautiful at sunset. The sea just caressing the sun whilst all the colours of the night sun and the sea just join together in perfect harmony. Got the scene set? You have? Good. Now imagine that scene with this in the background...

"Oh we're half way there! Oh Living on a prayer!"

Yeah, you'd think it'd be annoying wouldn't you? Well it was to start with but after a while you submit to the devil and start joining in with the guitar solo's. Anyway back to the journey to what I hoped would lead us to Russia. Lennie said he knew the way and I don't doubt him. Well I wouldn't doubt him usually, but after he's had about 4 bottles of Stella Artois and looks as stoned as Amy Whitehouse, even before she's had a night out, he isn't the best guy to trust.

"So erm Lennie. Ever been to Russia before?"
"Russia? I've been to Switzerland, bro."
"What! You know where Russia is don't you?
"Of course I know where it is..."
"You don't know how to get there, do you?!"
"Not exactly but a bro of mine said to go through Germany. So as long as we end up in Germany we'll be ok!"

Reassured? A little I guess. After what seemed like days of constant partying, we finally arrived at land. There were many pebbles and it was a kind of beach. We looked around but there were only hills and some fishing boats out. The Germans fish? Something didn't seem right. We went for a stroll down the beach, carrying the rubber dingy with us, until we came to a tavern that looked like a wooden inn.

We saw a sign hanging just above the big wooden door. We couldn't make out what it really said but I made out it said something like Valhal. I swear I've heard that somewhere before. There was also a picture of a person with a horn hat like thing on and a massive beard. It seems the Germans have changed alot these past 15 years... wait. That's a viking! Valhal... that must mean Valhalla! The place that the Vikings thought was the equivalent of heaven. But there's one problem. The Germans weren't Vikings, the thingys were.. Oh no, oh god please no. We must be somewhere in Scandinavia...

I turned round to warn Lennie that we must get out of here, what with the Scandinavian's known for their anger and hate of foreigners but when I turned round he had gone.

"Lennie! Lennie!"

I looked everywhere outside the tavern but couldn't see him anywhere. I called his name numerous amount of times but there was no response, not even to one of them. Where was he? I then had a sudden inkling where he might be. I heard a sudden voice shouting from inside the Tavern, shouting the lyrics of Over the hills and a far away by Nightwish, a rock band who orginated from Finland. That's when it hit me. Someone singing rock music who sounded high on drugs and alcohol? Had he gone in?

I had to investigate...

 

[Pakistani Army]

Jaz you beauty. What a fantastic read this is. I have loved ever bit of the first 2 pages. Keep this up.