Fake Passport
Mafia Mogul
- Joined
- Nov 23, 2016
So, I've had a frustrating couple of games. I'm not allowed to grab players by the collar and yell laws at them, or beat it into them with a over counter, so I figure I would do it figuratively online, because, you know, the internet listens.
1. I don't stand there for minutes signalling to the scorers because I think I look cool doing it, the accuracy of the scorecard of your match is reliant on those 2 volunteers acknowledging that they get what is going on. If it takes them a minute to catch up and acknowledge that's fine. Relax.
2. If you tell me that they ran short you just make it look like, when I call it, that I'm only doing it because you told me to. I saw it, let me do my job and you do yours. Similarly, I don't call front foot No-Balls randomly, and it really doesn't phase me if you have 'literally never been called before'.
3. I've been extremely lucky enough to have been tested for accuracy in calling LBW's independently. On this point I'm pretty damned cocky because I know my accuracy figures to a %age point on every metric, so you'll forgive me if I don't believe you when you walk past me and say 'you idiot, that was sliding down!', and also don't be surprised when your booked for dissent. (Broader note - Batsmen often forget they have a leg stump. You can be out LBW because its hitting leg as much as because its hitting middle - Yes, its true!)
4. No - my vision isn't that great that sometimes I can't tell if a ball had just crossed a boundary delineated by the odd cone, or whether it was boundary 4 or 6. My optical powers are limited by parallax as much as anyone's, and sometimes I will rely on the cues of the other umpire, or *gasp* the players closer to it.
[/rant]
1. I don't stand there for minutes signalling to the scorers because I think I look cool doing it, the accuracy of the scorecard of your match is reliant on those 2 volunteers acknowledging that they get what is going on. If it takes them a minute to catch up and acknowledge that's fine. Relax.
2. If you tell me that they ran short you just make it look like, when I call it, that I'm only doing it because you told me to. I saw it, let me do my job and you do yours. Similarly, I don't call front foot No-Balls randomly, and it really doesn't phase me if you have 'literally never been called before'.
3. I've been extremely lucky enough to have been tested for accuracy in calling LBW's independently. On this point I'm pretty damned cocky because I know my accuracy figures to a %age point on every metric, so you'll forgive me if I don't believe you when you walk past me and say 'you idiot, that was sliding down!', and also don't be surprised when your booked for dissent. (Broader note - Batsmen often forget they have a leg stump. You can be out LBW because its hitting leg as much as because its hitting middle - Yes, its true!)
4. No - my vision isn't that great that sometimes I can't tell if a ball had just crossed a boundary delineated by the odd cone, or whether it was boundary 4 or 6. My optical powers are limited by parallax as much as anyone's, and sometimes I will rely on the cues of the other umpire, or *gasp* the players closer to it.
[/rant]