D
dean_mag
Guest
Polly want a cracker?
HA HA HA!!!
: : :
HA HA HA!!!
: : :
D
dean_mag
Guest
Yes a polygon is a many sided shape but not in this joke!
M
Maestro
Guest
I figured that part out. ;D:
D
dean_mag
Guest
Well thats good to hear! 
:
:
N
nikhilverma
Guest
What did Bill Gates wife told him last night??
"Now I know why you named your company MICRO-SOFT"
: :
"Now I know why you named your company MICRO-SOFT"
: :
E
electioneering
Guest
Yeah old one,but good.
S
siddyjain
Guest
Funny things to do in an elevator
Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering:
"SHUT UP, all of you just SHUT UP!"
Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open,
then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger:
"Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"
Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask:
"Got enough air in there?"
Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm
handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
Stare at another passenger for a while. Then repeat in horror:
"You're one of THEM!!!"
Practice basic gymnastic moves such handstands, the splits, or summersault.
Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
Say "Ding!" at each floor -regardless if the elevator stops.
Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce:
"I have new socks on."
Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce
to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
When there's only one other person in the elevator,
tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering:
"SHUT UP, all of you just SHUT UP!"
Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open,
then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger:
"Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"
Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask:
"Got enough air in there?"
Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm
handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
Stare at another passenger for a while. Then repeat in horror:
"You're one of THEM!!!"
Practice basic gymnastic moves such handstands, the splits, or summersault.
Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
Say "Ding!" at each floor -regardless if the elevator stops.
Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce:
"I have new socks on."
Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce
to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
When there's only one other person in the elevator,
tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
N
nikhilverma
Guest
it's funny becoz it's so huge ...
Here is a list of companies that microsoft purchased
http://www.vcnet.com/bms/departments/catal...yrcatalog.shtml
and also got to
www.microsuck.com
Here is a list of companies that microsoft purchased
http://www.vcnet.com/bms/departments/catal...yrcatalog.shtml
and also got to
www.microsuck.com
N
nik
Guest
y does my pos t i keep postin in here get deleted?!
andrew_nixon
Chairman of Selectors
Because it was a completely pointless post. All pointless posts are deleted. Also questioning the actions of a moderator could lead to a ban, so as you have already had a warning for advertising, I'd tread carefully if I were you.
N
nik
Guest
ok sorry! :bow:
I
imported_potter
Guest
How to keep an ediot busy ? (scroll down)
How to keep n ediot busy (scroll up)
How to keep n ediot busy (scroll up)
N
nikhilverma
Guest
Now guys Rajnikant is an Indian hero famous for over-acting which defy all laws of physics and gravity
here is a joke
This scene description is for REAL!!!!
> > Recently Isaac Newton, the Father of physics made a
> > visit to earth to watch a movie. He watched a few
> > Tamil movies and his head started spinning. He was
> > convinced that all his logic and laws in physics were
> > just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything
> > he had done.(these are actual Rajnikant movies!!!)
> > In a movie starring Rajanikant, Newton was confused
> > to such an extent that he went paranoid.
> > Here are a few scenes:
> > 1)Rajanikant has a Brain Tumor which, according to
> > the doctors can't be cured and his death is
> > imminent. In one of the fights, our great Rajanikant
> > is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the
> > bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor
> > along with it and he is cured. Long Live
> > Rajanikant!!
> > 2)In one of the movies, Rajanikant is confronted
> > with 3gangsters. Rajanikant has a gun but
> > unfortunately only one bullet. Guess what he
> > does....... He holds a knife in his hand and throws at
> > the middle gangster..& shoots the bullet towards the
> > knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces and
> > kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle
> > gangster & the knife kills the middle one.
> > 3)Rajanikant is chased by a gangster. Rajanikant has a
> > revolver but he got no bullets in it. Guess what he
> > does. Nah not even in your remotest imaginations. He
> > waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the
> > gangster shoots, Rajanikant opens the bullet
> > compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet.
> > Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires
> > his gun.Bang... And the gangster dies.... This was
> > too much for the Great Newton to take, he was
> > completely shaken and he decided to go back. But he
> > happened to see a movie for one last time and thought
> >
> > that at least one movie will follow his theory of
> > physics. The whole movie almost goes ok and
> > Newton is feeling happy that all in the world hasn't
> > changed. Oops, not so fast.The Climax finally
> > arrives. Rajanikant gets to know that the villain is
> > on the other side of a very high wall. So high that
> > Rajanikanth can't jump even if he tries like one of
> > those superman techniques that heroes normally use.
> > Rajanikant has to desperately kill the villain
> > because it's the climax. (Newton is smiling since it
> > is virtually impossible). Rajanikant suddenly pulls
> > two guns from his pocket (Probably a backup). He
> > throws one gun in the air and when the gun has
> > reached the height of the wall, he shoots at the
> > trigger of the first gun in air, with his second
> > gun. Now the first gun fires off and the villain is
> > dead.Newton commits Suicide in the theatre
here is a joke
This scene description is for REAL!!!!
> > Recently Isaac Newton, the Father of physics made a
> > visit to earth to watch a movie. He watched a few
> > Tamil movies and his head started spinning. He was
> > convinced that all his logic and laws in physics were
> > just a huge pile of junk and apologized for everything
> > he had done.(these are actual Rajnikant movies!!!)
> > In a movie starring Rajanikant, Newton was confused
> > to such an extent that he went paranoid.
> > Here are a few scenes:
> > 1)Rajanikant has a Brain Tumor which, according to
> > the doctors can't be cured and his death is
> > imminent. In one of the fights, our great Rajanikant
> > is shot in the head. To everybody's surprise, the
> > bullet passes through his ears taking away the tumor
> > along with it and he is cured. Long Live
> > Rajanikant!!
> > 2)In one of the movies, Rajanikant is confronted
> > with 3gangsters. Rajanikant has a gun but
> > unfortunately only one bullet. Guess what he
> > does....... He holds a knife in his hand and throws at
> > the middle gangster..& shoots the bullet towards the
> > knife. The knife cuts the bullet into 2 pieces and
> > kills both the gangsters on each side of the middle
> > gangster & the knife kills the middle one.
> > 3)Rajanikant is chased by a gangster. Rajanikant has a
> > revolver but he got no bullets in it. Guess what he
> > does. Nah not even in your remotest imaginations. He
> > waits for the gangster to shoot. As soon as the
> > gangster shoots, Rajanikant opens the bullet
> > compartment of his revolver and catches the bullet.
> > Then, he closes the bullet compartment and fires
> > his gun.Bang... And the gangster dies.... This was
> > too much for the Great Newton to take, he was
> > completely shaken and he decided to go back. But he
> > happened to see a movie for one last time and thought
> >
> > that at least one movie will follow his theory of
> > physics. The whole movie almost goes ok and
> > Newton is feeling happy that all in the world hasn't
> > changed. Oops, not so fast.The Climax finally
> > arrives. Rajanikant gets to know that the villain is
> > on the other side of a very high wall. So high that
> > Rajanikanth can't jump even if he tries like one of
> > those superman techniques that heroes normally use.
> > Rajanikant has to desperately kill the villain
> > because it's the climax. (Newton is smiling since it
> > is virtually impossible). Rajanikant suddenly pulls
> > two guns from his pocket (Probably a backup). He
> > throws one gun in the air and when the gun has
> > reached the height of the wall, he shoots at the
> > trigger of the first gun in air, with his second
> > gun. Now the first gun fires off and the villain is
> > dead.Newton commits Suicide in the theatre
N
nikhilverma
Guest
Computer is Musculine Or Feminine
A language instructor was explaining to her class that French nouns, unlike their English counterparts, are grammatically designated as masculine or feminine. "House," in French, is feminine. "Pencil," in French, is masculine. One puzzled student asked, "What gender is computer?" The teacher did not know, and the word wasn't in her French dictionary. So for fun she split the class into two groups appropriately enough, by gender and asked them to decide whether "computer" should be a masculine or feminine noun. Both groups were required to give four reasons for their recommendation. The men's group decided that computers should definitely be of the feminine gender, because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else
3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for possible later retrieval and
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your pay check on accessories for it
The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be masculine, because:
1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on
2. They have a lot of data but they are still clueless
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem and
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you'd waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.
A language instructor was explaining to her class that French nouns, unlike their English counterparts, are grammatically designated as masculine or feminine. "House," in French, is feminine. "Pencil," in French, is masculine. One puzzled student asked, "What gender is computer?" The teacher did not know, and the word wasn't in her French dictionary. So for fun she split the class into two groups appropriately enough, by gender and asked them to decide whether "computer" should be a masculine or feminine noun. Both groups were required to give four reasons for their recommendation. The men's group decided that computers should definitely be of the feminine gender, because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else
3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for possible later retrieval and
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your pay check on accessories for it
The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be masculine, because:
1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on
2. They have a lot of data but they are still clueless
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they are the problem and
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you'd waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.
E
electioneering
Guest
Heard them before,but nice. :
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