The Jokes Thread

[Chewie]

From: Urban Dictionary: pwned

A corruption of the word "Owned." This originated in an online game called Warcraft, where a map designer misspelled "owned." When the computer beat a player, it was supposed to say, so-and-so "has been owned." Instead, it said, so-and-so "has been pwned." It basically means "to own" or to be dominated by an opponent or situation, especially by some god-like or computer-like force.

 

[pcfan123]

Only Uber n00bs don't know what PwNEd means.

 

[-D-S-B-]

Not a big fan of Warcraft tbh.

You's two are nerds

 

[Chewie]

I only know it because it's spread through to other games

But well put Mark

 

[pcfan123]

I know it from counter strike. I've never touched Warcraft, I like women too much.

 

[Chewie]

I know it from counter strike. I've never touched Warcraft, I like women too much.

haha same actually.

My friend's girlfriend actually plays World of Warcraft. She's trying to get him to play it haha

 

[mattfb]

My friend's girlfriend actually plays World of Warcraft. She's trying to get him to play it haha

Can't say I've heard of anything like that before

 

[McLOVIN]

A father passing by his son's bedroom, was astonished to see the bed
was nicely made, and that everything was picked up and tidy.
Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed,

'Dad.'

With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the
letter, with trembling hands.

Dear Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing to you. I had to
elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with
Mum and you.

I've been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I
knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercings',
tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much
older than I am.

But it's not only the passion, Dad. She's pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't, really
hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with
the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine and
ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so
Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself.
Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit, so you can get to know
your many grandchildren.

Love, your son, Joshua.

 

[mattfb]

You missed the paragraph which makes it a joke...

 

[Themer]

Haha. Thats worse than Bounce.

 

[fisch]

Been on my favorite site again.:laugh

Why does the boy next door get a lump in his pants? - The Landover Baptist Church Forums

I've just realised that Landover Baptist Church is a fictional parody, still good though.

 

[pcfan123]

You missed the paragraph which makes it a joke...

Haha yea

isnt it something about failing classes so don't get mad cause its not as bad as what I just wrote?

Pretty big fail there

 

[Biggy]

A father passing by his son's bedroom, was astonished to see the bed
was nicely made, and that everything was picked up and tidy.
Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed,

'Dad.'

With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the
letter, with trembling hands.

Dear Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing to you. I had to
elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with
Mum and you.

I've been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I
knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercings',
tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much
older than I am.

But it's not only the passion, Dad. She's pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't, really
hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with
the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine and
ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so
Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself.
Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit, so you can get to know
your many grandchildren.

Love, your son, Joshua.

Been getting your material from Meet?

 

[SciD]

Two cannibals were sitting by a fire. The first says, "Gee, I hate my mother-in-law.

The 2nd replies, "So, try the potatoes"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The first cannibal asked the 2nd cannibal, "Aren't you done eating yet?

The 2nd cannibal replied, "I'm on my last leg now."
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What did the cannibal get when he was late for dinner?

A. The cold shoulder.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When do cannibals leave the table?

A. When everyone's eaten.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other,

"Does this taste funny to you?"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Did you hear about the cannibal who was expelled from school for buttering up his teacher?

 

[pcfan123]

Sid you trying to tell us something? (please don't eat me)