Sachin_007
Club Cricketer
So should i post some Sardarji Jokes?
Sardar Jokes
- Thread starter borncricketer
- Start date
Yeah post jokes:
I am a Sikh, I grow my hair and my beard and Im proud of it, Im not religious but its good to have a spiritual side to u...I find the jokes funny, theyre not offensive at all...
As someone earlier sed, if you find em offensive replace em with blonde, irish or even silly person...
Ive got one...dunno if its been posted...
Why did the blonde/sardar/irish/redhead/silly ppl/bob fall out of the tree
...
...
They were all in a treehouse but it collapsed under all their weight
I am a Sikh, I grow my hair and my beard and Im proud of it, Im not religious but its good to have a spiritual side to u...I find the jokes funny, theyre not offensive at all...
As someone earlier sed, if you find em offensive replace em with blonde, irish or even silly person...
Ive got one...dunno if its been posted...
Why did the blonde/sardar/irish/redhead/silly ppl/bob fall out of the tree
...
...
They were all in a treehouse but it collapsed under all their weight
Sachin_007
Club Cricketer
manee said:Yeah post jokes:
I am a Sikh, I grow my hair and my beard and Im proud of it, Im not religious but its good to have a spiritual side to u...I find the jokes funny, theyre not offensive at all...
As someone earlier sed, if you find em offensive replace em with blonde, irish or even silly person...
Ive got one...dunno if its been posted...
Why did the blonde/sardar/irish/redhead/silly ppl/bob fall out of the tree
...
...
They were all in a treehouse but it collapsed under all their weight
haha...good one
kamrandahir
County Cricketer
Sardar on Phone
Once a sardar calls another sardar on the phone and says Hi,
Main Bol Raha Hoon.
The other sardar replies Kamaal Hain, Ithe Vi Main Bol Raha Hoon!
Boss tells his new employee, "Santa Singh, I'll give you 10 bucks an hour
starting today and in three months, I'll raise it to 20 bucks an hour. So
when would you like to start?"Santa replied, "In 3 months."
ik sardar jee se ek aadmeen poocha akal badhee yah bhens tu sardar jee thodha sochne ke baad bole pehleh dono ki umer batao phir batoonga
Santa Singh goes to a TV shop and asks, ''Aap ke paas color TV hai kya?''
''Haan'' replies shopowner.
Santa Singh says, 'Ek hara vala dena!'
A Sardar, a Japanese, and a British were lost in the desert.
They were driving around in a Jeep when it broke down, because they had nothing else they decided to each take a piece of the Jeep as they continued their journey.
The Japanese took the radiator, the British took the seat, and
the Sardar took the door.
After a while of walking the British asked the Japanese "I'm confused, why did you bring the radiator?"
The Japanese responded, "If I get thirsty, I can drink the fluid."
Next the Sardar asked the British "Why did you bring the seat?" So the British said "If I get tired,I am not going to sit on the sand. I can
sit on this comfortable seat." Finally the Japanese asked the Sardar why he had chosen the door.
The Sardar quickly responded to this question, "Well, when it gets
hot all I have to do is roll down the window."
Sardar proposed a Girl......Girl said ''I''m 1yr elder to you''.
Sardar said ''Oh! No Problem Soniye, I''ll marry you NEXT YEAR.
A Sardar & his wife filed an application for Divorce. Judge asked: How''ll U divide, Ur 3 children?
Sardar replied: Ok! Well apply NEXT YEAR
Sardar was writing something very slowly.
Friend asked: Why r u writing so slowly?
Sardar: I'm writing a letter to my 6 yr old son, he can''t read very fast.
Flash news: A Two seater plane crashed in a graveyard in punjab . Local sardars have so far found 500 bodies and are still digging for more..
Sardar went to meet his Chinese friend who is dieing in hospital.
Man says CHIN YU YAN and then he dies.
Sardar goes 2 china 2 find meaning of friends last words.
The Meaning is YOU ARE STANDNG ON THE OXYGEN TUBE!
kamrandahir
County Cricketer
more jokes
Sardar enters kitchen and opens the sugarbox. Sees inside and closes it.
Wife observes the whole episode
Again he comes and does the same stuff. Wife askes Why are you doing this?
Sardar replies: Doc told to check sugar level regularly
There was this case in the hospital's Intensive care ward where patients always died in the same bed and on Sunday morning at 11a.m. regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths took place at 11 AM. So a world-wide expert team was constituted and they decided to go down to the ward to investigate the cause of the incidents.
So on the next Sunday morning few minutes before 11 a.m., all doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy objects toward off evil........ Just
when the clock struck 11............
What happened?
Scroll down to that mystery
A friend asks sardar how was ur exam?
Sardar: It was ok but i couldnt answer past tense of THINK.
I thought, thought & finally i wrote 'THUNK'.
Tere was a Sardarji who was down on his luck. In order to raise some money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. He went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you." The Sardarji then wrote a note saying: "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag & put it beneath the mango tree next to the slide on the north side of the city play ground".Signed, "A Sardarji". The Sardarji then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the Sardarji checked, and sure enough a paper bag was sitting beneath the mango tree. The Sardarji opened up the bag and found the $10,000 with a note saying, "How could you do this to a fellow Sardarji?!"
There's a funeral procession of a sardar going on a busy street. All the sardars in the 'mayyat' are dancing the bhangra and singing and general 'balle balle' is on.
The people on the street find it strange that instead of mourning everyone is celebrating as if its a marriage baraat.
So one of them asks Santa Singh,
"Singh saab, aapka koi sage wala gujar gaya hai aur aap naach rahe ho?"
..... comes the reply,
" Haan ji ! Hai hi baat badi khushi ki !!! Aaj paheli baar ek sardar *brain* tumour se mara hai !!!!"
Santa was driving his brand new Porsche on a highway in Australia (speed limit of 110 kmph) when suddenly Banta came alongside in his brand new Ferrari.
Banta said, 'Kabhi Ferrari chalayee hai?!!' and sped away.
Santa was a bit annoyed and pushed his foot down. The car sped to 120 kmph and overtook Banta. But after a few minutes Banta again came alongside. And Banta said, 'Kabhi Ferrari chalayee hai?!!' and again sped away.
Santa increased his speed to 130 kmph and again overtook Banta. And again Banta came alongside within a few minutes. Banta said, 'Kabhi Ferrari chalayee hai?!!' before speeding away.
And so it went until Santa realised that he was now travelling at 200 kmph, well above the speed limit. He decided to act wise and slow down and let Banta act crazy. And then he noticed in his mirror that Banta had crashed into the bushes.
Santa stopped and went upto Banta with a smile thinking it was now time for him to ridicule Banta. He asked with sarcasm, 'Kabhi Ferrari chalayee hai?!!'
Banta replied with dismay, 'Nahee chalayee hai. Tabhi to pucch raha tha, keh BREAK kidhar hai'.
Sardar jhad pe bethkar gaa rahe the, achanak ek sardar jhad se ulta latak ke gaane laga, dusre ne pucha ki ulta kyon latka he, Sardar bola oye side B gaa raha hun.
Sardar: Doctor help me, mein jab baat karta huun to muje sirf awaaz
sunai deti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta.
Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai?
Sardar: Phone karte waqt.
Sardar enters kitchen and opens the sugarbox. Sees inside and closes it.
Wife observes the whole episode
Again he comes and does the same stuff. Wife askes Why are you doing this?
Sardar replies: Doc told to check sugar level regularly
There was this case in the hospital's Intensive care ward where patients always died in the same bed and on Sunday morning at 11a.m. regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths took place at 11 AM. So a world-wide expert team was constituted and they decided to go down to the ward to investigate the cause of the incidents.
So on the next Sunday morning few minutes before 11 a.m., all doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and other holy objects toward off evil........ Just
when the clock struck 11............
What happened?
Scroll down to that mystery
A friend asks sardar how was ur exam?
Sardar: It was ok but i couldnt answer past tense of THINK.
I thought, thought & finally i wrote 'THUNK'.
Tere was a Sardarji who was down on his luck. In order to raise some money he decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. He went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you." The Sardarji then wrote a note saying: "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag & put it beneath the mango tree next to the slide on the north side of the city play ground".Signed, "A Sardarji". The Sardarji then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the Sardarji checked, and sure enough a paper bag was sitting beneath the mango tree. The Sardarji opened up the bag and found the $10,000 with a note saying, "How could you do this to a fellow Sardarji?!"
There's a funeral procession of a sardar going on a busy street. All the sardars in the 'mayyat' are dancing the bhangra and singing and general 'balle balle' is on.
The people on the street find it strange that instead of mourning everyone is celebrating as if its a marriage baraat.
So one of them asks Santa Singh,
"Singh saab, aapka koi sage wala gujar gaya hai aur aap naach rahe ho?"
..... comes the reply,
" Haan ji ! Hai hi baat badi khushi ki !!! Aaj paheli baar ek sardar *brain* tumour se mara hai !!!!"
Santa was driving his brand new Porsche on a highway in Australia (speed limit of 110 kmph) when suddenly Banta came alongside in his brand new Ferrari.
Banta said, 'Kabhi Ferrari chalayee hai?!!' and sped away.
Santa was a bit annoyed and pushed his foot down. The car sped to 120 kmph and overtook Banta. But after a few minutes Banta again came alongside. And Banta said, 'Kabhi Ferrari chalayee hai?!!' and again sped away.
Santa increased his speed to 130 kmph and again overtook Banta. And again Banta came alongside within a few minutes. Banta said, 'Kabhi Ferrari chalayee hai?!!' before speeding away.
And so it went until Santa realised that he was now travelling at 200 kmph, well above the speed limit. He decided to act wise and slow down and let Banta act crazy. And then he noticed in his mirror that Banta had crashed into the bushes.
Santa stopped and went upto Banta with a smile thinking it was now time for him to ridicule Banta. He asked with sarcasm, 'Kabhi Ferrari chalayee hai?!!'
Banta replied with dismay, 'Nahee chalayee hai. Tabhi to pucch raha tha, keh BREAK kidhar hai'.
Sardar jhad pe bethkar gaa rahe the, achanak ek sardar jhad se ulta latak ke gaane laga, dusre ne pucha ki ulta kyon latka he, Sardar bola oye side B gaa raha hun.
Sardar: Doctor help me, mein jab baat karta huun to muje sirf awaaz
sunai deti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta.
Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai?
Sardar: Phone karte waqt.
thanks broritwik said:
biks76
County Cricketer
Well, the purpose of a joke is to create laughs.But whats the fun if someone is offended or doesn't like it?I thought this was a place where everyone was welcome.What might be right for one,may not be right for some. If only people were smarter and considerable to this.Thanks y2j826.
duffarama
Chairman of Selectors
Great jokes everyone. Keep sending them in!
kamrandahir
County Cricketer
A sardar was given the job of painting the white lines down the middle of a highway. On his first day he painted six miles; the next day three miles; the following day less than a mile.then the foreman asked the
sardar why he kept painting less each day,he replied "I just can't do any better. Each day I keep getting farther away from the paint can. "
A sardar walked up to the front desk of the library and said, "I bor-rowed a book last week, but it was the most boring I've ever read. There was no story whatsoever, and there were far too many characters!" The librarian replied, "Oh, you must be the person who took our phone book."
Surjit Singh saw that his friend Baljit Singh was very depressed. "What happened ?" asked Surjit. "Yaar, I lost Rs. 800 in a bet yesterday . " "How come ?" "Well, yesterday, the one-day match between India and England was being shown live on TV.I bet Rs.500 that India would win, but I lost the bet." "But thats only Rs. 500, where did the rest go ?" " Yaar, I bet on the highlights too "
Banta Singh happened to be in a queue at a railway station ticket
counter with two men ahead of him.
Ek Punjab Mail dena.'' demanded the man in front. He was given a ticket.
''Ek Punjab Mail dena.'' the second man asked and was handed a ticket.
Then came the turn of Banta Singh, ''Ek Punjab female dena!''
''What do u mean by Punjab female?'' asked the clerk.
''It is for my wife'' replied Banta Singh.
sardar why he kept painting less each day,he replied "I just can't do any better. Each day I keep getting farther away from the paint can. "
A sardar walked up to the front desk of the library and said, "I bor-rowed a book last week, but it was the most boring I've ever read. There was no story whatsoever, and there were far too many characters!" The librarian replied, "Oh, you must be the person who took our phone book."
Surjit Singh saw that his friend Baljit Singh was very depressed. "What happened ?" asked Surjit. "Yaar, I lost Rs. 800 in a bet yesterday . " "How come ?" "Well, yesterday, the one-day match between India and England was being shown live on TV.I bet Rs.500 that India would win, but I lost the bet." "But thats only Rs. 500, where did the rest go ?" " Yaar, I bet on the highlights too "
Banta Singh happened to be in a queue at a railway station ticket
counter with two men ahead of him.
Ek Punjab Mail dena.'' demanded the man in front. He was given a ticket.
''Ek Punjab Mail dena.'' the second man asked and was handed a ticket.
Then came the turn of Banta Singh, ''Ek Punjab female dena!''
''What do u mean by Punjab female?'' asked the clerk.
''It is for my wife'' replied Banta Singh.
y2j826
International Captain<br><a href="http://www.plane
Look at the title of the Thread " SARDARS AT THEIR BEST ". Dont u think its quoting on the religion. I think if they will came at their best then this world will never make partialities with them. I have heared many stories about sikhs and in all of them they always tries to help others and if someone hurts them they will try to treat them. So be careful of them, may be one day a Sikh guy who loves his religion very much messes with u cuz u quotes on him.
And about the "admininstrators" they do have to know that this one is not the thread for everyone, so better to delete this one or at least change the title of the thread.
And about the "admininstrators" they do have to know that this one is not the thread for everyone, so better to delete this one or at least change the title of the thread.
duffarama
Chairman of Selectors
I have made the thread title change effective immediately. As I said in one of my previous posts, PM me your concerns rather than hijacking this thread. Cheers.y2j826 said:
kamrandahir
County Cricketer
Lie Detector
An Englishman, an American and a Sardarji are called upon to test a lie detector .
The Englishman says: "I think I can empty 20 bottles of beer".
BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.
"Ok", he says, "10 bottles".
And the machine is silent.
The American says: "I think I can eat 15 hamburgers".
BUZZZZZZ, goes the lie detector.
"All right, 8 hamburgers".
And the machine's silent.
The Sardarji says: "I think...", BUZZZZZZ goes the machine.
Train Journey
Once a Sardarji was traveling on a train. He felt sleepy so he gave the guy sitting opposite him on the train 20 rupees to wake him up when the station arrived. This guy was a barber, and he felt that for 20 rupees, the sardarji deserved more service. So, when the Sardarji fell asleep, the barber quietly shaved off his beard. When the station arrived, the Sardarji was woken up, and he went home. Reaching home, he went to wash his face, and suddenly screamed when he saw the mirror. Said his wife " What's the matter?" Replied he "The cheat on the train has taken my 20 rupees and woken up someone else"
Sachin_007
Club Cricketer
Banta Singh walks into a bar in Ludhiana & orders
three glasses of Beer and sits in the back of the room,
drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.
The bartender asks him, "You know, beer goes flat after I fill it in the glass; it would taste better if you bought one at a time."
Banta Singh replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in Dubai, the other in Canada, and I'm here in Ludhiana. When they left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together."
The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.
Banta Singh becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the sameway. He orders three Beers and drinks them in turn.
One day, he comes in and orders only two Beers. All the other regulars notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second round,
the bartender says," I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss."
Banta Singh looks confused for a moment, then alight dawns in his eye and he laughs. "Oh, no," he, says, "Everyone's fine - both my brothers are alive".
"Only thing is ---- I've just quit drinking"!!!!!!
lmfao...nice one...reps for u...
Here's the cartoon...
three glasses of Beer and sits in the back of the room,
drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.
The bartender asks him, "You know, beer goes flat after I fill it in the glass; it would taste better if you bought one at a time."
Banta Singh replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in Dubai, the other in Canada, and I'm here in Ludhiana. When they left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together."
The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.
Banta Singh becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the sameway. He orders three Beers and drinks them in turn.
One day, he comes in and orders only two Beers. All the other regulars notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second round,
the bartender says," I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss."
Banta Singh looks confused for a moment, then alight dawns in his eye and he laughs. "Oh, no," he, says, "Everyone's fine - both my brothers are alive".
"Only thing is ---- I've just quit drinking"!!!!!!
kamrandahir said:
lmfao...nice one...reps for u...
Here's the cartoon...
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